- Take phone out of box and charge thoroughly.
- Ask 5-year old where the thingie is to plug it in? No, silly old person, that is for the ear buds.
- When half-charged, unplug and turn on.
- Try to figure out why holding the end call button actually turns the phone on.
- Stare at the blank screen and wonder what on earth to do with it.
- Ask 5-year old what to do next.
- Open manual and try to decipher all those little icons at the top.
- Ask 5-year old what they are.
- Sit and cry because you can't figure out how to unlock the thing because your flicker finger is a flunker.
- Finally find the little phone icon and attempt to make a call.
- Ask someone to call you back so you can see how it works.
- Pound on the green phone button when the phone rings and then cry a little more because nothing happens. Tap harder.
- Ask 5-year old why it doesn't work.
- Have that AHA! moment when you realize you have to slide the icon to answer the phone.
- Ask 5-year old how to send a text.
- Attempt to send text letting everyone your new number.
- Realize what little sausages your fingers are because what you touched on the screen is not at all what showed up.
- Look at manual again and figure out how to download apps.
- Download free apps until you can actually hear the SD card cry "Mercy."
- Play with your new phone all night and be worthless the next day.
- Thank 5-year old by letting her play Angry Birds for exactly 2 minutes before screaming, "OK, time's up! My turn!"
Becky Lyn Rickman
Mom of many, servant to my cats, Cary Grant's other girlfriend (still trying to work out the logistics of that one).